Jamaican Joke- 'Yu horse de pon di phone'

by Holly Allen
(Montego Bay, Jamaica)

One night a man was was relaxing watching TVJ (local TV station) when out of the kitchen came his wife with a pan --BOOF!-- "a who name Holly?" asked the wife.

"Mi jus see a paper eena yuh pocket wid di name 'Holly' pon it, WHO IS SHE?".

The man rubbing, rubbbing the back of his head, said "me and Richie did dung ah di racetrack tiddeh an dat is di name of di horse weh we bet pan, a wah duh yuh?!!".

So the wife apologized, kissed his head, and went back to her chores.

15 minutes later the wife storms out of the kitchen again --BOOF!! BAM!!

"A WHA DUH YUH?!!" shouted the husband, and the wife shouts back, "YUH HORSE DEH PON DI PHONE!!".

More Jamaican Jokes Here

Click here to post comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Your Jamaican Joke or Trivia.

2 face neighbour joke

by Howard
(Paterson, NJ, USA )

A man noticed that his neighbours daughter, a small child was looking at him excessively and was worried and puzzled as to the reason. The child wouldnt let up just following around the yard looking at him. He couldnt take it any longer and so in a very crude voice snapped," a whey yuh a luk pah so fah picney!!!". The child frightened in her step, remarked,"mamma seh yuh ave 2 face under 1 cap sar.

Click here to post comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Your Jamaican Joke or Trivia.

Joe returns to Jamaica (Joke)

by Admin

Joe in Office

Joe in Office

Joe grew up in Jamaica, then moved to the USA to attend college and law school. He decided to come back to Jamaica because he felt he could be a Big Shot at home.

He really wanted to impress everyone. So he returned and opened his new law office in New Kingston. The first day, he saw a man coming up the passageway. He decided to make a big impression on this potential client when he arrived.

As the man came to the door Joe picked up the phone. He motioned the man in, all the while talking.

"No. Absolutely not. You tell those clowns in New York that I won't settle this case for less than one million. Yes, the Appeals Court has agreed to hear that case next week. I'll be handling the primary argument and the other members of my team will provide support. Okay, tell the DA that I'll meet with him next week to discuss the details."

The "conversation" went on for almost five minutes. All the while the man sat patiently as Joe rattled off instructions.

Finally, Joe put down the phone and turned to the man, "I'm sorry for the delay but as you can see, I'm very busy. What can I do for you?"

The man replied, "I'm from Cable & Wireless, the telephone company, I came to hook up your phone.
Lol - DWL

Share YOUR Jamaican joke or Read Other Jokes Here.

Click here to post comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Your Jamaican Joke or Trivia.

What are the three things Jamaicans do FAST?

by Windy Picasso
(Spokane Washington,US)

And ANOTHER cool Jamaican, Droopy

And ANOTHER cool Jamaican, Droopy

EAT......DRIVE......TALK !!
Everything else.. "Just COOOL" (lol)

Click here to read or post comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Your Jamaican Joke or Trivia.

Only a real Jamaican....

by Admin

Thanks for this one Brenton :-)

Only Real Jamaicans call the entire leg, 'foot', and the entire arm, 'hand'

Only Real Jamaicans put crazy baby powder pon dem pickney neck after dem bathe dem! fresh wi seh!

Only Real Jamaicans say headtop, footbottom, neckback

Only Real Jamaicans live in another country for 50 years and never lose their accent

Only Real Jamaicans will say that gas is the reason for any pain and tea is the cure. "mi foot a hot me!", "drink tea... a gyas."

Only Real Jamaicans turn up @ a party at 1 a.m. an know seh it a done 2am an den cuss bout wah kinda? dat an dem jus reach...

Only Real Jamaicans have friends weh name "BIGGZ" "POOCHIE" "BROWN MAN" "MR CHIN" "INDIAN" "DRIVER" "JUICEY" "CREAMY" etc

Only Real Jamaicans rub white rum while sick instead of vicks

Only Real Jamaicans can have phone conversations with sound effects like " Ehheeeeeh , mhhm , ehhh ! , yuh tuh lie ! awoah

Only Real Jamaicans know that 'soon come' means anything but.

Only Real Jamaicans know that "foreign" is just one country .... maybe two

Only Real Jamaicans call pomegranate, ponganot.

Only Real Jamaicans are NEVER done talking when we say, "mi done talk!"

Only Real Jamaicans "Put it pon youchube"

Only Real Jamaicans Alphabet --Hay, B, C, D, He, Hef, Gee, Hich, Hi, J, K , Hel, Hem, Hen, Ho, Pe, Q, Har, Hes, T, Hugh, Ve, W, Hex, Hway, Z.

Thanks Brenton!

Click here to post comments

Join in and write your own page! It's easy to do. How? Simply click here to return to Your Jamaican Joke or Trivia.

Recommended For You ...

P.S. Didn't find exactly what you were looking for? Still need help?

Click Here to try our dependable and effective Site Search tool, It works!

Or, simply click here to ask me the questionI'll do my best to get back to you within 24 hours!

And, Before You Go!

Here (below) are some sweet deals on great Jamaican products at Amazon that you might have otherwise missed.

Amazon.com, by the way, is the internet's most reputable retailer and usually showcases only the best products from their inventory.

As an ardent customer and affiliate I earn a small commission from your purchase, at no extra cost to you. So thanks in advance.

Note: If link does not show, please click here to be redirected to our page at Amazon.com.

Great Articles You Might Have Missed

data-matched-content-rows-num="2" data-matched-content-columns-num="3"

Please help me get the message out by sharing this article with your friends on social media (links below). Thnx ;-)

Ready To Vacation?
Please Book With Us...

wellesley gayle - booking link

Was the information helpful to you?
Here is a great way to support our effort.

All you need to do is book your vacation via the reputable HotelsCombined.com search box below.

It can be for travel to Jamaica or anywhere else on earth.

They combine the best deals from across all major booking sites and shows you only the very best!

Not quite ready to book?  Start by searching (below) to get some amazing ideas now.

You are also welcome to join my special friends list and receive exclusive updates (like this), tips, trivia and stories from lovers of Jamaica! Just enter...

Also connect with My-Island-Jamaica.com on Social Media: 
Facebook | Twitter | Instagram | Youtube

Thank You!

Top Of Page
Wellesley Gayle

What's New? Click Here And See


Trending Now

My Gift To You!


Site Sponsors


Our Preferred Sponsors  & Friends (below)

(Our Sponsorship Policy)

Photographers in Jamaica
Wedding Photographers
Jamaican Souvenirs
Best Jamaican Souvenirs Cars For Sale In Jamaica
Cars For Sale

JamaicaSunshine Tours.com

Click Here to Visit Our Sponsors' Page

Top Articles

What's New?

Below is a list of the very latest articles I posted on the site.

Recent Articles

  1. How Did Jamaica Gain Independence?

    Mar 17, 18 09:32 AM

    Contributed by Tracie Shortridge Jamaica was inhabited by peaceful people called the Arawaks from South America. They were lovers of the earth and lived

    Read More

  2. Travel Deals To Jamaica - Here's How To Find Them

    Mar 14, 18 05:33 PM

    by Aneisha Dobson There are over a million reasons why people want to come to Jamaica. OK, I might be exaggerating but you get the picture - lots of

    Read More

  3. What Are Jamaica's Most Popular Food Festivals - Historically?

    Mar 14, 18 07:22 AM

    Food is such a revered source in Jamaica that various festivals are allied with the reaping phase. These festivals frequently satisfy specific collective

    Read More

  4. Finding Yourself - In Living For Others

    Mar 13, 18 11:28 PM

    Presentation To Students At Springfield All Age School by Wellesley Gayle || February 28 2018 “Only a life lived for others is a life worthwhile.” ~

    Read More

New!  I've created a Welcome Audio. Just click the Play button below to listen.

Please subscribe here to get my latest updates.